I m near...

In Recent Past Days I realize that I lack one thing which is extremely necessary 4 me. I knew that I need it badly if I want to live without making myself a drama, a tamasha. I have to get it kese bhi mang k, apne andar paida karun, khareedun, udhar kuch b.
What is pain every body defines it differently mere lie pain kia hai mein nahi samaj saki pr I feel it I cant give it words pr …. N sone p sohaga feeling of becoming tamasha. App ko apni nazrun se girne k lie ye b bohat hai nyways.
“Art of Hiding Urself” n “Thehrao”
Aj kal I m working on it with more efforts.
One thing more which I conclude from my life is “Most Painful thing is fear”. App kitni marzi khof feel kar lo u cant categorize them n mere khial mein fear don’t have types. Fear is just fear, shaded, unbearable.
Have u ever feel the “silence” upper neeche age peeche andar har side pe sirf khamoshi sirf……….
Pehle mera khial tha “Hiding urself ” n “Thehrao” aik hi chez hai pr nahi Ye aik ni hai pr han u can get 2nd by getting first. Agr app mein thehrao a jae u can hide urself n I think I m near if it…. :)